I am not going to turn this into a 30 minute video or torture you to read 10 paragraphs. Nor do you have to pay me anything LOL. Its easy.

Coincidentally I was talking to a dear friend today who was talking care of her mom, whose Parkinsons has her unable to eat or swallow. I cant imagine how horrible that must be for her. I am so worried about her since she is seeing her mother suffer every day.

One of the truths I have heard said so many times in so many different ways, was recently described to me as the “lens you look through” It was also described with a small story. Two people are standing on the curb looking at the street the one who looked left saw a car accident the one who looked right saw someone riding a bicycle.

You can only take in so much information. Your brain and eyes have to filter out so much and “focus” on something. There are always different things going on. The RAS, reticular activating system, decides which information to pay attention to and what can be ignored. A staggering 99% of all sensory input is ignored by the conscious mind

I actually reminded my friend that her two fabulous wonderful daughters are literally the product of her mother and her. She needs to focus on her daughters and remind herself, that is what her mother represents.

And give thanks every day for the fact that her daughters are successful and happy and her world is actually great, if she focuses on all of her blessings. And that is what her mother represents.

Actually she brightened up immediately and realized she was indeed focusing on only her mothers suffering vs her many gifts in life that were given to her by her mother.

PS you all have permission to shoot me when I get to that point in life. If we were living 50 years ago or 100 years ago would we prolong this kind of suffering? Who does it benefit? Its cruel and unusual punishment.

At some point in life isn’t it time to just walk up the mountain and have a sky burial? Thank god we are actually finally exploring our wishes, (ie do not resuscitate). Isnt it just American greed? I tried to google it. They claimed the last year is 10% of total health expenditure. But 10% for one year? I think they are misstating it on purpose. So you are paying 10% of your total healthcare for what? 1/85th of your life expenditures.

What is the cost to your loved ones in emotional trauma? I was lucky my Dad was in Florida. I only saw him once a year during his last few years. But I worried for my sister who visited him every day. I only have wonderful memories of my Dad, and one painful one. The last time I saw him he didnt know who I was. That was sad.

But seriously I am not advocating killing people. But I think we should all consider what our wishes are for our end of life care, and have living wills. And while we still have our wits about us, do we really want to cause our closest most loved ones to suffer and see us suffering when there is no chance of improving? And do we want our deteriorating body and or minds to be indelibly etched into their brain? You know that what we store with emotion is truly remembered above all else. Let me give you an example. Do you know where you were 9/11? How about 8/11/ ?

I hate to say this because I just thought of it and I will probably show this to my friend at some point. But she is literally overwriting all of the fabulous memories of her mother with these emotionally charged ones. I even remember staying at her mom’s place in the Hamptons around 40 years ago. I have lovely memories of her mom.

Ok I am on to a worthy segue. In this moment where are your loved ones? Are they in the room with you? Are your parents in Florida? Are they in heaven? If you are not talking to them right now do they exist? I wrote this on Facebook and found proof of it by other authors after I thought of it. But if they are not with you now whether they are in Florida or Heaven and you are not speaking to them in this moment do they exist in this moment that you are reading this?

By the way this is one of the ways to “release” in the Sedona Method. Are you here with me right now? Are you reading this? As you read this and process what I am writing does your “problem” still exist? I am once again trying to turn decades of practice into one sentence. But I am sure you get the idea.

My friend’s situation was just heartbreaking. Her mother couldnt even have a sip of water because it would go to her lungs and cause another hospital admission for pneumonia. I am just blown away by the cruelty of it all. Its wrong. There has to be a better way. But I seem to have segued off topic

Notice how your brain goes from one subject to another and all of the feelings that each topic brings up for you.

I am absolutely not advocating rose colored glasses. I am pointing out that you choose what you want to focus on every minute of every day. Its no different than changing the channel. Whatever is going on on the other channels still goes on. Did your spouse piss you off? Of course they did. They are the closest to you and with you every day. Did they also make you the happiest man or woman countless times? Do you still love their smile even if they arent smiling at you right now? Can you focus on wonderful times together? This is easy stuff people.

I wish I knew who to give credit to, he was on YouTube the other day. Ironically on my morning walk before the Anthony Robbins seminar, I was virtually attending that day I got this piece of wisdom that resonated with me because of the way he said it. PS that is why I write. I know that we all hear things and once in a while a certain line just makes a bell go off in your head. A few of my friends quote things I told them decades ago.

But back to what I was listening to that morning. He said “its the lens you look through.” That resonated for me. PS he was also talking about business. Do you see things through your customers eyes? Or are you stuck looking only through your own lens. Walking in someone else’s shoes means nothing to me. Except for hurting my feet. How did that get to be a popular expression? It means nothing to me.

See things through a different lens. See your life from a different perspective. See your business through your clients eyes. Even focus on different things in the world. Forget rose colored glasses. There is and will always be amazing good things happening as well as horrific things every single day. You get to choose what to focus on.